Monday, December 19, 2005

Santa under fire for unauthorized wiretapping

Angry members of Congress today fired the opening salvos today in a heated battle over the ethics of Santa Claus' unauthorized surveillance of children in the United States.

"This is just another example of one of the people we should be able to trust overstepping his bounds in the name of protecting the sanctity of Christmas. Where do you draw the line?" Said Harry Reid, Democratic Senator from Nevada. When it was pointed out that Santa has professed an alliance with neither political party, Reid said, "Red State, red suit?????? What's the difference?"

"This is a global war on naughtiness," an obviously angry Kris Kringle said today at a press conference. "Children are sneaky and are always thinking of new ways to get away with bad things. You can rest assured that any child who I suspect of naughtiness who is actually nice will get more gifts, for goodness sake!"

Hearings are expected today in the lobby of a New York Macy's.

Saturday, December 17, 2005

Tom Cruise to 9/11 Firefighters -- Cope With Your Loss By Joining My All Consuming Cult

It's fun to watch this fruitcake slowly but surely eliminate all traces of goodwill he's spent over 25 years building up.

Tom Cruise stood firm behind his controversial comments about September 11 rescue workers coming off their post-trauma medications when he visited New York City firefighters on Wednesday night. The movie star has been blasted by firefighters suffering the effects of smoke inhalation from the World Trade Center terrorist attacks after urging them to give up their medication as part of a 'purification rundown' favored by his Church of Scientology elders. But public criticism didn't stop Cruise and his pregnant fiancee Katie Holmes from visiting a New York City Rescue Workers Detoxification Project fundraiser, which he helped found in the wake of 9/11. The couple were joined by R&B star Usher. He says, "I started this project out of the great respect I have for the courage and service of the rescue workers. When I started this project I was in position where I knew I could help. I absolutely consider it an honor and a privilege to be here to help these men and women." The annual Tribeca gala raised $1.6 million. The project aids firefighters, emergency medical technicians, police Officers and the many first responders who were exposed to potentially dangerous materials circulating in the air after the collapse of the World Trade Center.

Thursday, December 15, 2005

Somebody punch Nancy Grace in her smug face.

Who decided that this woman was worthy of her own show? My wife had her turned on when I walked in this evening and she seems to be getting her jollies by talking about all of the forensic evidence of rape, sexual assault, decomposition, etc. that could be found on the recently discovered body of Teketria Buggs, a 12 year old discovered dead today. Her guest was trying to be discreet and she rolls her eyes and says "can you do better than that?" acting as though he's trying to cover up something. She was trying to grab for ratings and make a name for herself. Her rolling of the eyes and her prodding for sensationalism is disgusting. She's a pig and deserves to be taken off the air.

Wednesday, December 14, 2005

Putting the F in the FCC

I always thought the Republicans were against big government interfering in people's lives. I guess that only counts when it isn't a question of morality. Now we FCC dork Michael Copps saying that we need legislation on cable TV to help weed out sexually explicit and violent material on cable TV.

If Michael would get his head out of his butt long enough to study up on the matter, he would find the following:

1) Cable TV is optional. Nobody has to buy it.
2) TVs have V-Chips. This came about through legislation.
3) Cable TV boxes have the same locks on them.
4) TVs have an off switch. Parents can turn them off whenever they wish.

I'm sick and tired of this administration making a case for "morality" as they lie, cheat and steal their way through their days in office. Legislating cable TV to sell by the channel will lead to higher cable prices. Let them offer a family tier and be done with it.

FCC Commissioner Questions Cablers' "Family Tier" Plan

FCC member Michael Copps is urging Congress to move forward with measures that would curtail sexually explicit and violent material on cable TV. Appearing before a Senate Commerce Committee hearing that is considering his reappointment to the commission, Copps, a Democrat, appeared decidedly unimpressed with Monday's proposal by several cable companies, including the two largest, Time Warner and Comcast, that they provide a "family tier" of cable channels. "We've got to define what a family tier is. We've got to figure out how much it's going to cost," Copps told the Senate panel. "I don't think we're anywhere near the point where we can say we don't need legislation. ... Let's keep pushing. ... We got a long way to go." The Senate Committee also heard from Deborah Taylor Tate, whom President Bush nominated as a Republican member of the FCC following the resignation of former chairman Michael Powell. Tate found it "incredible" that the cable companies were quickly developing "a voluntary, I guess, code of conduct."

Saturday, December 10, 2005

From Fake Mobster to Cop Killer?

Busy day in celebrity news. The death of Richard Pryor is the big story of the day, but while reading that, I caught the tale of young actor Lillo Brancato Jr., now accused of killing a cop in New York.

Shooting suspect was once a rising star

Associated Press Writer

December 10, 2005

NEW YORK -- Just a dozen years ago, Lillo Brancato Jr. was going to be a star.

The unknown actor earned critical acclaim opposite his idol, Robert De Niro, in the 1993 movie "A Bronx Tale." He played the Oscar winner's son in the story of a teen torn between two role models _ a local mobster and his dad _ in a heavily Italian Bronx neighborhood.

From there, Brancato went on to appear in more than a dozen films, including "Renaissance Man," "Crimson Tide," "Enemy of the State" and "The Adventures of Pluto Nash." Brancato later enjoyed a recurring role on "The Sopranos," eventually getting executed by fictional mob boss Tony Soprano in one of the series' more memorable departures.

But on Saturday, the actor was far from the bright lights and red carpets of Hollywood fame. Instead, police said, he was breaking into the basement of a vacant Bronx house when a gunfight erupted and an off-duty city police officer was killed.

Brancato was just 16 when De Niro launched a search for non-professionals to appear in his 1993 directorial debut, the film version of Chazz Palminteri's play "A Bronx Tale." Brancato was discovered by a casting director strolling along the sands at Jones Beach; he came out of the water and wowed him with impressions of De Niro and Joe Pesci.

In a New York Times profile, he was described as "friendly, earnest, sweet-tempered, a fast talker, a salesman, the kind of goofy tough guy who once upon a time used to hang out on a city street corner." Brancato, 29, was raised in the Yonkers by adoptive parents, and he still resided in the city just north of the Bronx.

Brancato, born in Bogota, Colombia, was adopted when he was 4 months old. "I consider myself Italian," he once said. "I was raised to eat pasta."

In 1999-2000, he appeared in a half-dozen episodes of "The Sopranos" as a dim-witted aspiring mobster. In one episode, his character worked a high-stakes card game where the players included Frank Sinatra Jr.

Brancato also starred in the short-live TV mob show "Falcone," and guest-starred in a 2002 episode of "NYPD Blue."

His most recent appearance in the headlines came in June, when Brancato was arrested by Yonkers police after they discovered four glassine bags of heroin during a routine traffic stop.

Friday, December 02, 2005

Pioneering French Doctor Says In Your Face!

Realizing that it's far better to have a pretty face that could potentially be rejected and kill you than to have one that's severely disfigured, those deep thinkers the French have transplanted a face on a 38 year old woman who was severely mauled by a Labrador Retreiver mix.

The doctor who performed the face transplant, Dr. Jean-Michel Dubernard, also has done a hand transplant and double forearm transplants. Reports out of France say that he's going to attempt to do more experimental surgeries that promise to help out thousands more French citizens, including the first personality transplant, and a sweat gland transplant into the underarms of a French college student who can't produce an adequately repellant smell.

Elsewhere in France, it was reported that veternarian Jacques Endeabocks plans to help the Laborador come to grips with his identity crisis by transplanting the face of a pit bull onto him.

Friday, November 25, 2005

FEMA Head will now Plan Disasters!!!!

I just love the headline on this. So Michael Brown will now be planning disasters? He seemed to be doing so well just letting chaos take its toll, but I'm sure things will be much worse if he plans the disaster.

Ex-FEMA Head Starts Disaster Planning Firm Fri Nov 25, 9:31 AM ET

Former FEMA Director Michael Brown, heavily criticized for his agency's slow response to Hurricane Katrina, is starting a disaster preparedness consulting firm to help clients avoid the sort of errors that cost him his job.

"If I can help people focus on preparedness, how to be better prepared in their homes and better prepared in their businesses — because that goes straight to the bottom line — then I hope I can help the country in some way," Brown told the Rocky Mountain News for its Thursday editions.

Brown said officials need to "take inventory" of what's going on in a disaster to be able to answer questions to avoid appearing unaware of how serious a situation is.

In the aftermath of the hurricane, critics complained about Brown's lack of formal emergency management experience and e-mails that later surfaced showed him as out of touch with the extent of the devastation.

The lawyer admits that while he was head of the Federal Emergency Management Agency mistakes were made in the response to Katrina. He also said he had been planning to quit before the hurricane hit.

"Hurricane Katrina showed how bad disasters can be, and there's an incredible need for individuals and businesses to understand how important preparedness is," he said.

Brown said companies already have expressed interested in his consulting business, Michael D. Brown LLC. He plans to run it from the Boulder area, where he lived before joining the Bush administration in 2001.

"I'm doing a lot of good work with some great clients," Brown said. "My wife, children and my grandchild still love me. My parents are still proud of me."

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